Saturday, 21 April 2018

Catch My Tears

I’ve got my headphones in, music playing as my heart sinks,

silence except what I’m listening to as the hidden stars sing.

I used to be a soul that used to stay smiling and laughing,

but now it’s beyond the comprehension of what far is.

It’s painful when you realise no one cares the way you do,

invested time becomes wasted time when you learn the truth.

Effort becomes regret as I spend my life away on YouTube,

watching relatable videos as they become a coping tool.

My poetry is dying, the ink in my pen is fading,

my sorrow is extinguishing the flame that was blazing.

It’s a downpour of sorrow and my heart has no shelter when it’s raining,

I’m a soul breathing it’s last few, will somebody save me?

No. My thoughts echo so loud it becomes clear to hear,

no one is there and everything is as I always feared.

A heart in solitude is the worst pain, catch my falling tears,

no, they won’t be caught because nobody is here. 

Tuesday, 6 March 2018

My Heart’s Mourning

I’m paralysed by the memories of yesterday, of the days that were my better days. Those memories that carved the image of your smile, they remained but your reality was what went away. 

my heart still sheds tears, my mind is still fighting away those fears. I lost my world on that regretful day, oh my love, how I wish you were still here. Your silhouette, it’s still here. 

My love has become a legend in the heavens, the angels weep for my failure in understanding my blessings. You were the light in my life so shadowed, I only dreamed of what would be a beautiful wedding, you standing as angel in ceremonial dresses. 

It’s been 4 years since I kissed you, no day has passed where I hadn’t missed you. I still miss you and Its an issue, because I can’t live my life,  I can’t breath without you so I need to be with you. I still love you and you know it’s true.

How can this be a life without your love? This torture and torment has become too much. It’s unbearable yet the devil never thinks it’s enough, filling my mind with those painful memories of us, beautiful pictures of our love. 

Romeo now turns in his grave, his love but a story erased. Burning inside that a truer love now exists in a new time and place.

Legacies displaced, no longer an example for new loves grace, Romeo curses himself for this.

Juliet mourns in her tomb, her heart bleeding mortal wound. Romeo had not loved her this much, now she does not regret her unpredicted doom. She envies my love, unrequited yet flowers still bloom.

My cries reach the stars, they resonate through the dark, ripping through the fabric that keeps the light so far. 

It is my only wish that she will hear it, the mourning of my heart. 

Friday, 2 February 2018

Empty Streets

I’m walking down those lonely empty streets,

my mind clouded with so many heavy dreams.

My only memories of you are destroying me,

and they don’t ever seem to want to leave.

I saw the universe in the glow of your eyes,

and it was then I knew that you had to be mine.

Your beautiful face would always be sketched in my mind,

what was this feeling? was this the thing called love I despised?

I miss the touch of your hands, I can still feel the grasp,

though your heart and soul had travelled into the past.

My heart wishes every night for just one more chance,

something impossible now, ours was a love never meant to last.

I wonder how you’re doing now, how much happier you are,

I wonder where life’s taken you, has it healed your heart?

Mine’s still broken, my love, I tell my pain to the stars,

because they are the only light I have left in this dark.

I could never forget the beautiful way you made me feel,

whenever I was with you, I thought it couldn’t be real.

It had to be a dream, my projected desires revealed,

how was I to to know it would end with both of us needing to heal?

Can I tell you something, my darling, truthfully I still wait,

It’s crazy, I know, I’m just hopeful of destiny & fate.

I wish in my heart that you’d come back to me and say,

“I miss you as much as you miss me”

cause that would be great.

cause it seems that wherever you went, my heart had followed,

it couldn’t sit there, it couldn’t wait until tomorrow.

It was losing it’s soul, it started becoming so hollow,

and before it left, it told me..”if it’s love, then I have to follow”

Tuesday, 16 January 2018

still your friend

I spent my life in the shadows chasing your love,

days would pass and I would always think it’d never be enough.

I spent my nights dreaming of a future, of a possibility of “us” ,

but my mind fights with my heart and tells it that it’s hoping too much.

I used to do the littlest things that could make you smile,

anything is worth your happiness, my motto in life.

Yeah, maybe it’s true, I seemed to only have love in my eyes,

you camping in my heart was devastating the thoughts in my mind.

Years could pass by and nothing would ever change,

I’d still care for you the same, that love would remain.

No matter how much we may argue or fight, unresolved issues,

you’re the one person I would never turn my back on to this day.

While those feelings of love have diminished, I’m still your friend,

I will still be there for you, every day right until the very end.

So don’t you worry, princess, I’m here for you if you need a shoulder,

and I will try my best to fix the broken heart that needs a mend.

Wednesday, 10 January 2018

My Heart Surrenders

I’m being crushed by 

the weight of my misery,

I can’t stand anymore, 

there’s nothing to keep lifting me.

My heart was 

once touched by

a love that existed 

in my history.

Until it hated 

my many flaws,

I lost all hope of 

any kind of victory.

And this shadow 

pushes me down,

I can’t find the 

strength to push it off.

I’m losing sight 

and slowly this sound,

I’m losing myself 

and my soul is gone.

What is this feeling 

that is inside me,

it chased my soul away, 

was the devil invited?

My heart is screaming,

in the realms it resides in.

No one listens to 

what it has to say,

or any of the poems

it kept on reciting.

They call it depression,

but I have a question.

How do you label

something that kills us?

We’re physically alive

but we give up living.

Nothing in our minds,

our hearts are wilting.

Decaying in the dark,

no light in our eyes.

Can’t you find a remedy,

please take away 

all of my memories.

I think that would truly

be the best for me.

I’ll die if I remember,

my heart surrenders.

Saturday, 6 January 2018

My Silent Heart

Oh, there she is.

What do I say?

Should I try today?

No. I can’t.

I’m too nervous.

I’m nobody.

She’s perfect,

I’m not even worth it.

What do I do?

She’s so cute,

what do I do?

Tell her the truth?

She wouldn’t acknowledge me,

She’d brush me aside like I was dirt.

A few words define my worth,

and I’m actually scared of

the words that she’ll return.

“I don’t like you”

“You’re ugly”

The words of truth,

I’ve heard my entire life

And never hidden from me.

Yet why do I like her,

she stands out in my eyes.

It’s not her velvet hair,

Or her sapphire eyes,

Nor her beautiful smile.

How would I know unless I try,

but I’m scared of rejection.

I always have been, 

I usually push my feelings aside

and continue with reflections

and those unreal dreams.

I will never be able to share my feelings,

My heart is now used to bleeding.

My thoughts inside my head are screaming,

and the devil’s whispers, “keep on dreaming”

I can only share a glance, 

but never take the chance.

I can only look at you,

but you’ll never know the truth.

I can only just write these poems,

but will you ever read them?