Laying in bed just contemplating things I regret,
Just floating thoughts whizzing past in my head.
Sometimes I ask myself if it's better to be dead,
And sometimes I wish it whilst I lay in my bed.
I can't find all the questions and I can't always find the answers,
And these regrets and remorse are plaguing me like cancer.
Sometimes I think about whether I still want to live,
and wonder about the things I've still yet to give.
I make more mistakes than the usual ordinary soul,
And I think less logical and worry less about growing old.
I lack common sense and make decisions I regret,
And curse nearly every single one of my defects.
Yet people love me and I just don't understand why,
Is it just me or are they actually blind?
Or is it cause they have hearts and think less with their minds,
And I'm just a fool that believes everything is a lie.
I have a wife to be that never wishes to change me,
And loves me for my imperfections; damn that's amazing.
I thought I'd never find love especially around me,
And someone who says that they can't live without me.
Yet I find myself to be depressed late at night,
With thoughts that tease me and tainting my sight.
Thinking about my sins and the choices I made wrong,
It'd be infinitely endless if I listed them in a song
So many thoughts during an hour of late,
Should I just accept myself and my destiny and fate?
So many thoughts I can't seem to find relief,
Should I just forget it all and rely on belief?